We're BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK

A 7+ hour ride with a 16 month old, 6 year old, two dogs, a woman with PMS, a man going to miss his Thanksgiving football ritual and a partridge in a pear tree. But, we made it! We made it to the beautiful Ozark "mountains" -- they're more like big hills but they're still beautiful. Our cabin was very quaint... made of cedar, featuring an open staircase and a loft with an eat-in kitchen, master bedroom, central heat/air, a wrap-around porch and a fully-functioning shower and who could ask for more! Right? Ha!

After the quaint left, reality sank in, I soon realized, not only is this place not childproofed, it's NOT CHILDPROOFED. There was no way to keep my busy-body-chihuahua-on-caffiene-kid off the stairs. Did I mention there wasn't a rail on the stairs? It's jsut "stairs"... and a wall. It's VERY beautiful but oh so scary to be holding a kiddo on one side and walking down with nothing to hold onto. The stairs were made from chunks of cedar so they weren't completely uniform in depth and it was nerve-racking to walk down them holding him. Oh yeah, and did I mention there wasn't a ROOM to put him to bed in so we had to TRY to be quiet... so he could nap. He and Josh were in a loft upstairs. Tell a 6 year old that likes to walk with lead in his heels to be quiet. Pshaw! The first day and a half were quite trying. Once we settled into a sort of a routine, it was MUCH better. But boy was I stressed out!

So, we got there on Wednesday... Andy and Josh started a campfire. It's truly hilarious watching Josh try to be so grown up. He thinks he is THE fire professional. He loved watching leaves burn... poking the fire with the stick. But, they heard a noise in the woods (it's PITCH BLACK other than the lights from the cabin and the fire) and he was literally running for the door. Josh and Andy roasted hotdogs on the grill for dinner and then went back outside to roast marshmallows. Drew had not had an afternoon nap, nor much of a morning nap so I put the little guy to bed (sort of). He had to whine and scream a good ... oh 10-15 minutes in his pack-n-play and it was lights out. I was exhausted so I was out soon after on the squeaky, creaky, full sized bed (yes, I'm used to a king...where you can roll and roll and never touch the other person). It was cozy but I love the king. :) Gotta have my space. Andy tried to stay up and read (he's the night owl) but turning on a lamp means that the light went up... where it could be seen in the loft...which made Drew wake up... which made him cry... which made us all that were TRYING to sleep...be unable to. Couple that with just the uneasiness of being in a new place and it was a LOOOONG first night. I was up about every hour on the hour.

Thursday I awoke to a little guy probably wondering where the heck he was. I made breakfast -- bacon and waffles. Simple simple. Then, I got to cooking the feast. Josh and Andy went on an adventure walk. They followed a little trail down marked with blue ties along a property line (or for novices like us that think we're the epitome of a pioneer family) and then were back. The meal was wonderful. I made stuffing from scratch, roasted turkey, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes and gravy, rolls, cranberry sauce, pecan pie for dessert. It was great. And the best part was that since it was made away from home, I wasn't having leftovers for weeks afterwards! :) WOO HOO.

Sidebar: Drew would have nothing to do with anything resembling real food. He's never going to eat more than mush and crackers. It's SO weird.

Then, later that night, I had a complete melt-down. Yes, me, the woman having BAD PMS, no sleep, hand-washing all the dishes (how did those pioneer women DO it?) had a meltdown. Drew, my sweet little busy little blonde who has also had no sleep has decided it's fun to slap mommy in the eye... then he bloodied my nose with a tray... he's just mean. I had just had it. I couldn't stand the person that he was turning into -- just mean and hateful and unable to be pleased and I just blew a gasket and had a meltdown. Andy just held me and said calm down.. he's just tired... and he'll outgrow it. Yes, I know this and why I couldn't realize it at the time, I have no idea. Ugh... needing reassurance isn't what I'm all about at all! (usually) I was ready to go home that night. Literally. I was like.. I want to be here ALONE by MYSELF! lol... you go away! All things with things that dangle... go away! LOL... After REAL sleep, life was much better. Amazing how that works huh?

Friday we got up and piddled... Drew was much better today. We went for a hike ... I can't even remember the name of the place. It was really fun. Just a small hike but by the time we got up, ate breakfast, cleaned up the dishes, drew went down for a nap, woke up, ate lunch, it was time to get out of there.... spend an hour or so out and then head back to the house. Drew kept taking off his hat and then he'd whine to put it back on... he liked walking around the cave out of the hiking pack but had to go back in it to get back home. He threw a fit the last oh.. 10 minutes of the hike. Oh well! :) Andy got a good leg workout in toting him about. Friday night Andy made another fire and I still didn't get my first smore. :( Drew just wouldn't be still around the campfire...then the wind would shift and the smoke would blow in his face and he's just FREAK... and when Andy took him in, he'd scream so guess who got to go sit on her butt in the cabin with him? Yep, me. I had one roasted marshmellow and no smore... I guess I've made it 32 years without a smore... what's a few more?

I did go on a nature walk with Josh... I think it was Friday morning during Drew's nap... I don't remember... I know we all took a good nap one day... I'm guessing Friday too... heck, don't get me lying. : )

I've learned a few things ... campfires and babies do not mix... small beds suck when you try to roll over... put trashcans where they cannot be tipped over by dogs who can smell the food remnants inside... it's really dark in the country trying to watch dogs pee outside without a flashlight... cabins without insulation between the walls yield no privacy... bring more than 2 Elmo videos when you're cabin bound with a baby

All in all it was a great trip and beautiful scenery. IT'll be more fun when Drew's a little older or we stay someplace where he has a ROOM and can be locked up in it with some silence to relax instead of cutting his naps short because Josh can't not slam his heels down when he walks... it's weird. I way more than twice his weight and I can walk lighter than a feather... he has to make his presence known I suppose. :)

Now to bed... in my KING SIZED BED....

Tooth Down--Many More to Go!

Yep, that's right... Josh pulled his 2nd tooth out today! Guess I need to get my fairy wings ready! :) He's already packed that little booger safely in his tooth pillow for me to sprinkle with fairy dust and add a few bills to it! Amazing stuff they believe in huh? I was videotaping it in the bathroom and Drew started to get in the toilet paper (it's such a fun game)... and he goes "I GOT IT" and of course, the camera wasn' t on him. UGH Oh well... I tried darnit!

Poignant Moments

Ever have those poignant moments where your heart is just tugged in about 100 different directions? I had one this morning. I was dropping my eldest off at school. Sometimes I feel so lazy because I let him walk up the covered sidewalk walkway to the door by himself while other parents walk their children in (Pre-K parents HAVE to) but I, since having Drew, have given Josh the choice -- usually asking him if he wants me to walk him up and he always elects to do it alone. I'm not sure if that's a big step for him or if it's a silent defeat for me. Do I want him to NEED me to walk him up or just even WANT me to. In that small path, he usually runs into a friend and I watch them walk in together so I know I'm not the only mom staying warm in the car, but it still makes me feel like he's so much closer to not needing me at all. This morning it was chilly - in the 30s and he was wearing his thick coat and his red/grey fleece hat because he said his ears were cold and I watched him walk up there all by himself and I felt sad that he had no friends to walk with and I wanted to get out of my car and walk with him so he wouldn't be alone. I know it sounds really silly but I sat in my car nearly in tears knowing that these days won't last long... pretty soon, he won't WANT me to walk him... not just not need me to. So, in these next few weeks -- as cold as it may be... I'm going to walk my little man to his class. We will get to school a little earlier so I can help him get everything in his locker and out of his backpack and we can have one more moment of walking hand in hand together... while he still wants me to. They grow up so fast!

A heart as big as Texas

I had one of those moments where your heart is just beaming with pride at the simple acts of kindness bestowed upon mere acquaintences by your own child. I do believe Joshua has a heart as big as Texas. Tonight at church -- Wednesday is AWANA night -- we had "store night". Josh repeatedly saves his money during store night not wanting to indulge on "stuff" for him. He chooses to save his money so he sees just how much he can get. It's amazing! Tonight at store night, he bought 8 things.... 6 pencils to be able to give one to each person in our class. He did get one for himself but he then gave it away to Blane... what a giving spirit he has! And the only two things he bought were Christmas gifts for Ashley and Terri up in Iowa (my ex husband's neices). I can't tell you how proud of his giving spirit and kindness. He looked up at me last night because he felt so good to give and said, "Momma, do you think my heart is this big?" as he drew a circle on his chest with his two pointer fingers. I just pulled him close and said, "Honey, I don't know how a heart as big as yours can even stay in a chest so small.... I think it fills up all your inside" to which he just smiled proudly. As did I. So far, I must say, I've raised him right. He's got a generous and giving spirit and it couldn't make me more proud.

Honk Honk rasp Bark Bark

Yes, that is the sound I woke up to this morning. Baby Drew -- the child who has NEVER had a sickness in his life -- woke up HONKING when he took a breath. A trip to the doctor's office confirmed croup. That's what I get for taking him to Mc-freakin-Donalds! It's like.. Do you want a burger, shake and a side of croup with that?" UGH. I should have known better than to let him go through the tubes but he was SO excited because no one was there -- we had the play area all to ourselves on Monday... things are never what they seem in those places... it's like a giant germ petri dish inside those tubes I'll bet. All those lazy moms that won't keep their kids in when they're coughing, hacking, runny noses...they still take them out and get everyone else infected with their filth...UGH.. drives me crazy! So, now an oral steroid for 5 days and hopefully we'll still be able to make the trip for Turkey Day!

Oh the joys of boys

Well, that's not all true and not all about boys. Drew is into EVERYTHING right now... the drawers, my make-up drawer in the bathroom, the cabinets, the bowls, the dryer, the dog bed, the toilet, the bathtub (fell in -- it was empty), you name it -- he's in it.

He's a bundle of energy too. He loves to be outside to pick up any leaves that may have fallen to the ground, dead earthworms, rocks that need to be washed off (in his mouth). He loves the outdoors. He's started saying Josh too. It's so cute to hear him say that. And socks.... anything that goes on his feet or that can go over his feet are socks.... it could be shoes, socks, booties, slippers, pants, pajamas, if they go on the feet -- they are socks. Got it? Are we clear on that?

Right now, he's fighting nap time because I'm sure there is something ultra interesting that he's going to miss and I'm trying to find (well, ok, not right this minute) a recipe to make mini meatloaves in my pampered chef stoneware baking mini loaf pan. I think it'd be pretty cool to have several small ones that cook faster than one momba-gomba one. Isn't that just a gross word -- meat - loaf. A loaf of meat. Sounds rather appetizing? BARF! lol...

I totally caved on my diet last night as we went to Red Lobster... oh the lobster/crab stuffed mushrooms topped with ooey-gooey melted cheese and sitting in a butter bath, oh the cheddar bay biscuits, oh the popcorn shrimp with tartar sauce. I did opt for the steamed veggies in lieu of a loaded baked potato and I only at 1/2 of a biscuit. I ate all the veggies and all my salad...only drank water and no dessert. :) It's been so long since I had a real meal so that was nice! :) Now back to my tofu, bark and rabbit food. Oh what joy dieting is to the pallate... it just sucks all the joy out of eating. I cook these wonderful meals that smell so wonderful throughout the entire house and I sit down with a big salad.. blech. BUT if it works, that's the best part! :)

Tomorrow I'm supposed to start back at the gym... I need dto wish myself luck and probably get into bed by like now to get up at 5:30 am. Blech. I hate exercise ... especially when I should be sleeping. Hopefully it'll just be a quick routine to get used to and then I'll be back in shape in no time! :)

Living in the world of walking on eggshells

Have you ever made a off-side comment, trying to evoke a bit of humor from your "audience" only to have it turn completely upside-down, inside-out and backwards? Wow. I pulled a doozy on a friend of mine today and WHACK.... what an impression I made (not!).

So... after you've offered your apologies (even if you can't get a word in) you look back and realize... I really didn't DO anything wrong. It's all with intent and perception. I didn't INTEND to hurt although it was perceived that I did. So am I responsible for hurting someone's feelings when it was obviously not my intention? No. I don't believe anyone should take ownership for something so completely out of their hands. Should they offer apologies for a misunderstanding -- sure. But once words are said and they're out there... they just can't be taken back. Should you have to walk on eggshells and not be yourself for fear of hurting someone's feelings... not only no, but HELL NO! Our friends ARE our friends because WE CHOOSE THEM to be. You're stuck with your family. Your friends, however, you get the fortune of picking! So, misunderstanding or not, friends forgive and forget as they wouldn't be your friend in the first place if they really think you would do something to hurt them. Life's too short to sweat the small stuff man. Just get over it! Think of how small and unimportant a single incident really is in the grand scheme of life. Will it matter in 10 minutes? Perhaps... 10 days? doubtful.... 10 months... probably not.... 10 years... absolutely NOT...

:) More later... just had to vent. Get over it... I am.

Puberty at 32?

Ok... so my face broke out in ONE spot. I should just forget about it right? NO! I just don't get break outs and when they do occur, I'd rather hide in a cave until they disappear! I am so thankful for my genes in that I've always had good skin. Mom - Dad...thanks!

Today was a typical day. Josh was supposed to have soccer skills training but he didn't -- because I didn't take him. I had an afternoon-napless kid that was entering melt-down zone along with picking up shards of glass from my floor -- yes the maid who conveniently didn't tell me she broke my crystal sugar bowl lid and didn't bother to clean up the floor afterwards? I'm like hello -- you've SEEN my two children running around barefoot in here. The very LEAST you could do is vacuum. I swear having a language barrier is a real booger sometimes. I think if you're IN America -- and you want to work in a SERVICE industry -- speak the freakin language. Is that really too much to ask? Oh, and that she keeps calling Drew... Alex? LOL... I'm like... hey.. check your alter ego at the door, Maria... this is Drew... D - R - E - W. I do try so hard to be compassionate with these that come here and do jobs that no one else will do... but come ON there has GOT to be some give somewhere!

My best friend Christie is making me a monster rock cd. I'm really looking forward dto that. She just turned THIRTY THREE! Yikes... I hate being in my thirties. I never thought that I'd be one to really detest aging but I do. I mean, you get wringles, things don't stay where God put them. Aging is a cruel joke. You need money to laugh back (so you can get your ass lifted back to where it's supposed to be!).

I'm doing great with the baby weight loss thing now that I'm able to win the battle of the will power in my mind. Why is that little freakin devil sitting on my shoulder all the time going "snack snack snack"... finally I kicked his horny little butt and I've lost over 15 lbs! :) I've got about another 15-20 to go and I'll be happy with me again. Well, that and a tan... and some extensions LOL... just kidding (about the extensions)... I'd love my hair to be long again... and to be COMFORTABLY back in my size 6's again.... my day is coming...and I will NOT put on that Holiday 10 everyone talks about. :) I'm going to be THE ONE that continues to lose during the holidays... you watch.

Santa... I'm asking Santa this year for my CKU classes in Atlanta. I'm so excited to go!!! : ) That and an OTT light for my scrap room... AND... (I know, isn't that enough)... peace on earth (HA!)... where's my freakin tiara! just kidding... and... oh there was somethign else... Oh yeah, a complete Demdaco nativity set. Well, at least a piece or two so I can START the darn thing. :) I've bid on so many of those on e-bay only to get outbid and it really sucks!

I've gotta go bathe a little guy... he's talking into a microphone right now...and then going ultrasonic...sounds kind of like a little howler monkey. I'll get it on cd one of these days... my luck it'd be some babboon mating call and they'd all swarm! lol.

Late-

Move Over Rachael Ray!

I seem to outdo myself quite often in the kitchen. Tonight -- manicotti florentine. YUM-O! :) I should BE so lucky to get paid for cooking!

Great day for the most part. Ran errands, finished up Christmas shopping. Gotta shop for the little people.

Right now, jammin on Kid Rock and about to Scrap! :) Need to post some pics of my goodies... we'll see how that goes. I'm sure it'll be a long night -- little man went down an hour early without dinner so I think he'll be doing an 11 pm feed me session.

Sigh... oh well.

The little man

Well, to spend some time focusing on the little man today -- Drew. What a wonderfully bright and energetic little spirit. A funny quirk of his is that when he walks, it's like he's always falling. I guess that's why he's a toddler. He must be in constant motion. Curly blonde locks in the back that I dare not cut! Yes, he's a boy and I dress him as such but I can't bring myself to cut those off. He loves Little Gym on Tuesdays but that's only because once he's spent about 10 minutes playing, he gets to run to the closet and say "bah" (ball)... he wants to get the balls out and play. He has a small but ever-growing vocabulary...

bah - ball (first word)
mah mah - that'd be me
dah dah - doggie
kah kah - cracker (this stands for any crunchy food)
soss (sounds like sauce) - for socks... it can be for booties and shoes too... pretty much anything that goes on his feet. :)
nah nuh - banana
touch - touch -- this is because I let him touch the fringe on our lamps upstairs every day and now if you pass anything with fringe he wants to touch.
bi bi - bye bye
meh - milk
emma - Elmo
tah kah - Tiger -- Andy was letting him watch golf and shows him Tiger Woods yesterday. He was like a little parrot

He knows sign language for milk so he usually does that for milk and doesn't say it.

A newly acquired talent is from watching the Wiggles. Yes, I do sit through and endure an episode of the Wiggles (well, at least 10 minutes of it) daily. They do a song where they sing "Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Cock-a-doodle-do" and have these little hand motions that go with it (kind of like the chicken song done at lame wedding receptions) and he likes to make like he has little wings and flap them. It's very cute indeed!

He likes to dance by squatting up and trying to jump -- usually by landing right on his bum. He loves the dogs -- even though he's generally chasing them around the house with things to poke them. Books are a treasured commodity in this house! he loves the ones that have movement and pop up. Board books are good chew toys we've discovered.

And, his latest love -- ELMO! :)

More later!

The beginning of it all.

Well, it's a blog. What can I say. I'm going to use this to see if I can get my thoughts down daily. Not that my life is overly exciting, mind you, just rather, I'd like to see what kind of life it's really like being a true soccer mom. :)

More to come but for now... back to my online chat at www.scrappergal.com :) It's an AWESOME site for scrapbooking and I'm not just saying that b/c I'm on the design team. :) Check it out!