Just a Monday - random thoughts by yours truly

Nothing special much about today. I've decided not to do Meal Plan Mondays anymore. Why? Because I like to have them written down on my fridge, not on my blog which means I potentially have to kick someone off to look at said blog to figure out what I'm to defrost today for dinner. If it's on the fridge, it's just a walk to the fridge and bam -- done deal!

But, just in case you're curious... today we're having picaunte chicken. It sounds way more fancy than it is. It's chicken breast tenders that are cooked in a skillet with some onions and peppers. Then you drain and pour in a can of black beans, Mexican corn and a jar of salsa (or picaunte sauce... I think that's just how they say it in different areas of the country).

Today we finished Josh's math book. We are officially done homeschooling math. We will continue to read good books and do writing and language arts because I'm weird like that.

My boys were wonderful and let me sleepin until 9:30 today. It's funny to even CALL it "sleeping in" when I was up all night. It's more like "catching up for my sanity and patience so that I don't snap on a whim and bite your head off." But I think they just saw it as an opportunity to play Wii. :) Love the Wii sometimes.

They've gotten along swimmingly lately. They are LEGOMANIACS! It's crazy!

Drew still wasn't feeling 100%. He's supposed to have t-ball practice today. There's a HUGE weather system moving this way. Not sure we'll still have it... looking rather ominous outside but we shall head that way if they are. Ben is swingin... he loves that darn swing. I hate that he loves it so much. I'd rather hold him. Where's that darn sling I need?

I'm having some lower abdominal distress issues. Sucks. Hopefully I'll be able to get that taken care of in the next few days. :(

Mom called, she's got shingles. She gets them from stress. Having 10 applicants to screen for the PD and gallbladder surgery certainly should have stressed her out, should it? HA! I just hope she feels better soon.

Josh and I had a long, long talk last night. He broke down into tears when he realized a few things about someone he held in very high regard. He asked about the divorce between his father and I. He asked about my mom (we've had a VERY less than desirable relationship). He asked about lots of things. He's very wise beyond his years. He told me things that had been told to him... and I basically told him that anyone is welcome to blame whatever they want on me. He couldn't BELIEVE I said that. I said, "...and do you know why? Because I don't care. I have better things to do than to take on some one's guilt or anger or excuses. They can fling them all my way but they won't stick because I don't care." He really appreciates that I'm that way. He saw a parallel between himself and my father (such a wonderful man). That was very moving. It was a good talk. He understands a lot of things now. Things that a young boy shouldn't have to but when you're the product of a broken home, it's inevitable. He doesn't understand why his bio dad is insisting on his five weeks' visitation. Josh has expressed on multiple occasions that he doesn't WANT to go up there for five weeks. Josh wanted to know where that magic number five came from. I had to explain court documents. "Can't you get it changed?" Man, if it were only that easy. We'll see how it all turns out. Josh wants to go up there for June and be home in time for his team party (just under 4 weeks). He doesn't want to go BACK up there after his summer camp but that's what his bio dad is wanting. It's so sad for him to feel like he has no voice.

He expressed how thankful he is for a mom like me. How he loves how much I cook good, healthy meals not only for dinner but breakfast and sometimes lunch too. I try to make sure they eat from the rainbow and limit processed junk. I have explained to him that anything I wanted in life became all about my children when I became a mom...because to me, that's the most important thing. I told him how my goals aren't gone, they're just on hold because for me -- being able to be there is my job. Taking care of my boys IS my world and that makes me happy. I think he realized a lot of things in our talk last night.

Josh realized that he has to speak up for himself... even at the possible expense of some one's feeling. He learned that people will make you feel bad to persuade you to do what they want you to do but if you really feel strongly about something, never be afraid to let your voice be heard. Because no one can pick up on hints or read minds. The only way to communicate your true feelings is to let them be known. He's going to have to face his father and do this.

One blessing from our talk was that he realized how wonderful it is that we CAN talk about anything. I explained to him that I don't have that kind of relationship with my mom. He couldn't comprehend my mom not having MY back or me not having his. I just explained that some people aren't wired like that. I am, however, and he knows that now. He thinks I'm a strong person to have no one to go to like that. But I do... I take my problems to God... and so we ended our talk by me telling him that whatever his worries are, the best thing he can do is to give it to God because it will all work out however it is intended.