Dog's Pet Peeves

My husband sent me this today and it just cracked me up so I had to share and make comments! :)


Ten Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans

1. Blaming your farts on me... not funny... not funny at all !!!

2. Yelling at me for barking.. I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!
-----I must say I'm guilty of this one. I think it's like how yawns are contageous... that these little guys just feed off one another. I mean, one bark I can understand. Thor trying to jump through a window to get at a girl selling girl scout cookies is yet another matter

3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
-----I sent a reply back to Andy about this because he makes Thor walk in the street so he doesn't sniff. I never worried about my dogs much... let 'em sniff.

4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose... stop it!
-----mine don't have noses TO balance things on. IT'd have to be balanced on the top of their heads.

5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.
-----my mom SO does this! lol.

6. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.

7. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!
-----My funny story about this is when I took my dog, Boomer, in for a snip. Poor dog. I caught him trying to make baby puff-a-terriers with my pillow. He finished ON MY PILLOW. I was so grossed out. My dad said "maybe you had a sexy pillow". So, the next morning, the vet was called and the dog was in the following morning at 7:15 a.m. I picked him up that afternoon and had to pick him up and put him in the car. I drove a Jeep Cherokee at the time. The two front seats were divided by a console. I told Boom to scoot over and he slowly put two paws up on the console and then as he put his front two paws down onto the passenger front seat, he left his two back paws up on the console. He then slowly turned around with his little butt right in my face and looked at me as if to say, "hey there... do ya notice something missing here? I really think you need to go have a talk with those people as I am not happy." He just sat there ... I laughed... helped him get situated in the blanket I brought for him and off we went. He went home and hid under my bed and had nothing to do with me for about 3 days. I'm happy to report, however, that none of my pillows have been chosen as a mate since then.

8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.

9.Dog sweaters. Hello ???, Haven't you noticed the fur?
-----yes, dogs have fur but mine are spoiled, pampered short hair dogs that need the extra fluff!

10. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous.

Now lay off me on some of these thing's, We both know who's boss here!!! You don't see me picking up your poop do you ?