5QF: You're a jerk! I know!

1. Would you rather pay for house cleaner or spa day?
House cleaner, without a doubt.  I'm not much of a "spa girl."  The idea of some weirdo pawing me kind of gives me the heebie-jeebies.  I would NOT be able to relax.

2. Who plans what gifts you get for holidays, you or your spouse?
We each plan our own...unless we're doing a "joint" gift like for our anniversary where I said what I wanted and he complied... because what HE was going to get ME was just something for ME and what I wanted to get US was something for ...well... EVERYONE.

3. How many hours of sleep do you get? Do you need more?
Lately, about four a night.  I have entered the horrible, hellish realm of insomnia it is affecting every.single.portion.of.my.life.  I hate it.  I hate it.  I hate it.  I don't want to take meds for it but I'm about .   . that close to getting a prescription for a sleep aid.  Unfortunately, I had some bizarre conversations under the influence of Ambien CR.  It was, however, THE most restful sleep I have EVER HAD IN MY LIFE.  I think bizarre conversations about melting ceilings and weird, random text messages are certainly worth a good night's sleep now and again.

Photo Credit

4. Do you like your hair long or short?
Long, only because then I can pull it back in a pony tail and wear a baseball cap.  I have had short hair though.  It just means that you ALWAYS have to fix it.  

aaaand... the ballcap

5. When was the last time you were pulled over and what was it for?
I was pulled over for speeding the day I was on my way to put Sadie down.  I was sobbing and miserable...and the stupid, heartless, piece-of-shit cop gave me a ticket.  I still hope he should get a serious case of diarrhea... while stuck in gridlock traffic... in the far....left...lane.... after having a Route 44 Diet Coke... and having to sneeze.

But, hey, no hard feelings... right?  Don't ever forget...

Five Question Friday

1. Where do you hide things from your kids at?  First and foremost, I must comment that I hate when sentences end with a preposition.  Do not end sentences with a preposition.  Don't!  

Whew.... okay...shake it off...

I do not hide things from my children.  If they have a surprise coming, it's easily accessible in a box in my room (prior to being wrapped, of course).  I can easily gauge from their response whether or not they have peeked.  The burden is upon them to not be a snoop.  It's fairly simple.  So, I hide things in plain sight.

2. What is your favorite rainy day activity for bored toddlers?  Benadryl.  

I'm KIDDING!  Sheesh, don't call CPS on me (yet).

Depending upon the weather, we may go play in the rain.  

Otherwise, coloring, painting, movies, baking, Play-Doh and science experiments top the list of rainy day activities.

3. Are you a punctual person or are you always running a few minutes (or more!) late??
I **try** to be punctual but there is just no hurrying a 13 year old... an 8 year old... or a 3 year old.  It simply can't be done.  It also seems that no matter if I give us one hour or 30 minutes extra time, we're always pushing it.  It drives me BAT SHIT CRAZY to be late!  

4. When eating out, do you prefer off the beaten path "Mom and Pop" cafes or tried and true national food chains?  I prefer hole-in-the-wall establishments because they are generally authentic and delicious.  Unfortunately, too, they're typically calorie laden foods bubbling in fat so the best bet for me is to not eat out whatsoever.  

5. Does your significant other snore? Do YOU snore?  Oh... GOD.... BLEH... this is an every day nightmare.  I want my own room.  Seriously.

I *do* snore, however, but ONLY if I'm on my back.  Even then, however, it's not the sawing petrified forests like I sleep on the couch to avoid.  This is one of my favorites... LOL

Five Question Friday

1. How often should adults have birthday parties?  As often as they want.  It's **their** birthday.  Now, just because they CHOOSE to have a party every year doesn't mean that it's something everyone **else** wants to celebrate BIT that doesn't negate the fact that the birthday girl (or guy) could choose to have a party.  

Frankly, however, I think parties should be reserved for 

a) those that want them 

b) the decades (30, 40, 50, etc.) 

c) and they should never include wait staff singing.

2. What was your room decorated like when you were a child?  When I was a little girl I had shag green carpet and my room had white walls.  I had a white bedspread that had print that resembled a quilt (but it wasn't a quilt).  It looked like the squares were made of ribbon and the colors of the flowers in each "square" were orange and yellow with accents of green.  

3. Do you have any traditions for Easter? If so, what? and do you have a why behind that?  Nope.  I mean, we do the baskets... the egg hunt... the food.  Once upon a time, I went to church... but it's just an ass whip with a two year old and frankly, not worth the struggle to me.  An exercise in futility... and I hate being called to pick him up.

4. Do you get Good Friday off? If so, any plans?  I never get any days off...are you freakin kidding me?  I'm a mom.

Source:  The Mommyhood.com

5. Did you wear hats & white shoes to church on Easter? (Or was that just in the South?)  I think once.. as a kid... and then my mom wised up and realized how ridiculous that was.

Five Question Friday

1. What is one thing you wish you did not have to teach your children?
Hmmm...this could be deep or silly... truly heart-felt or ... sarcastic.  There are so many directions I could take this. I'm going to say that it is a tie between:

a) using the toilet.  And, by this I mean, not only MAKE IT IN THE BOWL, but also to put the lid down, wipe your own butt, use toilet paper when necessary (don't even ask) and WASH your hands afterwards.  Benji will be out of diapers by the end of May I'm hoping!  

b) learn the value of studying, trying your best and appreciating your education.

2. What are you going to use since Google Reader is going away?  Feedly.  I seriously just about went into a full-on panic attack when that stupid message popped up on my screen.  GOOGLE -- YOU SUCK!

3. British comedy; Hilarious or strange?  Over-rated.  Oh wait, that wasn't an option. Strange.  Stupid.   

4. Do you prefer card games or board games?  Either.  I have no preference.  However, I am much better at board games because the directions are clearly written.  Most card games consist of someone dealing you and hand and then teaching you what to do as you go.  Inevitably you can't be brought up to speed as quickly.  And, since I have to win... I like to know all the rules right from the start.  I can tell ya, I play one wicked game of Candyland!

5. Will winter ever end?  End?  What are you talking about?  When will it ever START?  It was worthy of sweaters here maybe a total of 5 days.  And now... this is as of right now.

Five Question Friday

It's time for Five Question Friday over at My Little Life.  One of my favorite little spots on the web.  



1. Does your family coordinate clothing for church on holidays like Easter?  I'm lucky to get my 13 year old out of basketball shorts....so the idea of trying to coordinate ANYTHING with him would be a complete exercise in lunacy.  Maybe we should follow this family's lead and just go all matchy-matchy at the next function?!

2. How do you get out of a funk?  Kill it at the gym.  Bend a caring ear.  Get away for some quiet time.  Eat a vanilla thumb-print cookie.  

3. Online friends - real friendships or not?  I believe that a TRUE "friendship" can only be defined by the parties IN said friendship. As an outsider looking in, it may seem superficial and inconsequential.  However, to the parties involved in that friendship, it's very real.  

I'm a member of a hidden private group on Facebook consisting of women on a journey of fitness, health and clean-eating.  I have befriended many of these women outside of this group and YES I would genuinely consider them REAL bonafide true blue friends.  Do we go out and shop together and meet for coffee and/or dinner?  No...but you know what?  I don't have time to do that with anyone else EITHER!  

So, can you truly cultivate friendships with those whom you are completely unable to  personalize a friendship with?  I suppose it depends on what "personalize" means to you.  

A friend is someone to whom you can turn and frankly, sometimes it could very well be another person in cyberspace whose countenance you may have never personally graced but has just as much care about your inner well-being as they do their own.  

A friend... is a friend.  I don't believe they can be defined any other way.

4. What is the one food you must eat in a restaurant (not make yourself)?  Seafood.  I'm grossly terrified of under cooking my fish and then dying of some parasite or worse, anisakiasis!!!  GROSS!

5. What would happen in your home if you ran out of ketchup?  I would add it to the shopping list and buy some in the next day or so.  I have a two-year old so it's actually a food group, you see.  We never run out, however.  

Five Question Friday

1. What was the most productive thing you have done this week?  Should I be embarrassed that I have to look at a CALENDAR to actually SEE what I did this week? I think this week I should say it is keeping everyone alive...especially my eldest son since he had to have an ass transplants from having his chewed off repeatedly.

This question (and my response) reminded me of the photo (below).... Remember when you asked what I do all day?  Today, I didn't.  LOL  

2. Enjoying the winter or ready for spring?  I like either.  We don't really HAVE "winter" in Texas much so it's not really bad here.  I don't want shorts weather yet if that's what you're asking.  I never like shorts weather.... I'm like... WHITER than white.  Paler than pale.  I'm like... Casper!

3. Are you an introvert or extrovert? Is your spouse the same as you?  It depends on the situation.  By nature I'm definitely an extrovert... but am very capable of adapting to new situations where perhaps being an introvert would be more accommodating.  I don't know... why don't you ask him.  I don't really like to answer for other people.

4. Would you rather go without music or television for 1 year?  Television.  Easily.  In fact, I can't remember the last time I actually WATCHED an entire 30 minute show.  

5. Have you ever been truly scared of someone?  Yes.  

Five Question Friday

Welcome to Five Question Friday hosted by My Little Life!

1.  What holiday do you wish did not exist?  

Hmmmm…. You know, I could probably create a list of them.  On the horizon we have Valentine's Day.  V-Day is a rather stupid celebration in my opinion created by the confectioners across the country.  Oh, and the Hallmark Corporation... maybe American Greetings, too.  

Women bitch and complain about our weight... only to have our significant others buy us a ten pounds heart shaped box FULL of chocolate.  

"Here, honey, I love you. Eat this.  I’m sure you’ll ultimately gain 15 pounds.... and I will no longer find you even remotely attractive… but you’ll remember just how much I love you on THIS day… because… well… it’s VALENTINE’s DAY!

Cards.  The price of a card is like $4 each!  EACH?  And that is a median price. 

Don’t even get me STARTED on the cost of flowers!  JIMINY CHRISTMAS!!  I’m almost OFFENDED that someone would feel SO compelled to give into a ridiculous tradition that they’re mindset is that of a drone “must please the Mrs.  Must buy overpriced everything so she feels loved and validated.”

If you have to do THAT to make someone feel loved and validated, you need to step your ass up to the plate because you’re severely lacking!  One day a year isn’t going to cut it!  She should feel loved and appreciated and desired and sexy and wanted and needed – EVERY SINGLE DAY!  Don’t bring flowers because you’re OBLIGATED by corporate pressure to prove your love…. Bring flowers because you LOVE her and want her to know that it doesn’t take a date on the calendar for you to want her to know how much she is cared for. 

 

Now, if you’re one of those that DOES do it all the time but still WANTS to do it on Valentine’s Day, too, then have at it.  Spend triple the going rate for flowers to prove your love.  Ga’head.  (You may do that knowing that makes me think you’re still an idiot.  No hard feelings.)

2. What is your favorite romance/love movie?

Anyone that knows me knows that I don’t have a “favorite” (singular) of most anything ever.  That being said, however, “The Notebook” is ONE of my favoriteS for sure.  I love the idea that she was willing to risk unfavorable opinions, hard feelings, broken hearts, and lose everything to be with the one man that truly completed her.  Their love story, to me, is amazing. 

3. Do you make a big production out of celebrating Valentine's Day?

I would think by reading my answer to No. 1, you’d know better.  I will make a steak dinner for the family and prepare them something sweet.  That’s about it.  I will get the boys a little something to put at their place settings at the table but… Josh is 13… he doesn’t want crap.  Drew is 8… he doesn’t want crap…. Benji is almost 3… he will throw crap – that I don’t want to clean up.

4. What is something weird you did as a child? (or even now!)

I used to clean and reorganize the junk drawers when I couldn't find what I want because there was so much junk there.  I would also clean/reorganize my grandmother’s pantry and bathroom cabinets.  Sometimes I got paid.  Sometimes we just went to Braum’s for an ice cream.  Just an example of how my perfectionist anal-retentive OCD started at a very early age.  I like things to be precise, perfect, exact.  Always have.  My standards are very high... sometimes to my own detriment.  It is what it is.

 

5. What makes you love your husband, really LOVE him, you know since Valentines is coming up?  

He makes me laugh.  He admits when he is wrong (we won’t go into how often that is…)  He is a good father and provider for our family.  He eats whatever is put before him without complaint.  He knows better than to argue with me.

Five Question Friday

1. Have you set any goals/resolutions for 2013?
Absolutely not.  I don't "do" resolutions.  I (usually) make my mind up when I wake up that TODAY is going to be the best day it can be.  Sometimes that goes immediately in the shitter and some days, it truly comes to pass.  However, I think setting yourself up with an end-all-be-all type of resolution is ridiculous.  I think having a goal(s) is healthy.  I think you will fail trying to achieve those goals.  However, the only ones that truly succeed are the ones that NEVER GIVE UP... if you feel that one failure means you failed... then you really HAVE failed.  Why?  Because you ONLY fail... when you QUIT TRYING!  

2. Have you made any travel/vacation plans for 2013?
Yes.  Road trip to Oklahoma this month.  Road trip to Colorado in June.  Looking at some hiking time this summer... maybe some backpacking... I'm thinking New York is in order for early winter next year... and a few other trips in between.

3. What room is never cleaned in your house?
Never CLEAN or never CLEANED?  Every room in my home gets cleaned.  That would be gross to have a room that isn't cleaned ever.  

4. What food must be in your house at all times?
Hmmm.... for the kids?  Cereal.  Drew, I think, could eat Cinnamon Life every day... three times a day... plus snacks if you'd let him.  

5. Are you a hugger or more of a hands off person?  
I am definitely a hugger.  I'm not afraid to touch someone... unless they're sick... and then I treat them like they have the Bubonic plague!