Sunday, December 2, 2012

Sunday Stealing - Not So Manly Meme

1. Boxers? Briefs? Boxer briefs? Thongs? Bikinis? Commando?
Well, I hardly feel our relationship is qualified in my eyes for me to even answer this question -- I mean, we really don't even know one another.  May I just say "yes" and leave it at that?  Truthfully, there is a time and a place for all of the above.  

Boxers -- for sleeping
Briefs -- for when you're like... old
Boxer Briefs -- for if you're male (which I'm not)
Thongs -- I already wrote about that here
Bikinis -- when there isn't a need for hiding panty lines
Commando -- yeah.... I'll leave this one blank.  Just... because I can.  

2. What’s your fussiest personal care routine?  Relatively speaking, I'm about as low maintenance as a female can come.... Well, perhaps not TOTALLY "low maintenance" as I did see a woman with the start of a beard on Saturday... but relatively speaking based on my current locale, I am QUITE low maintenance.  Perhaps the fact that I like my toenails painted (always) would qualify as a fussy personal care routine.  I can do my makeup in about 3 minutes flat.  My hair?  In a pony tail and baseball cap or blow dried straight.... minutes.  My wardrobe, not fussy... just classic and simple.  ??? I don't like "fuss."  Maybe shaving?  That's kind of a pain in the rump... but I do it.  

3. Do you have a favorite tool? Power or manual?  Yes, my brain... it's a power tool.  

4. Can you change your own oil? Do you?  I used to be able to.  My grandfather taught me how.  That was five cars ago.  So, no, I wouldn't know how to on "Mini."  

5. What’s the “manliest / 'womenliest” thing you do on a regular basis?  "Manliest" thing I do? Does lifting weights count?  "Womenliest" thing would perhaps be that I get PMS on a regular basis. I don't like it -- but it happens.  

6. What’s something “manly” that you never learned how to do?  Pee standing up -- for obvious reasons.  But, tell the truth, if you were at a urinal and saw this...would you not FREAK THE HELL OUT?!

7. Do you ever cry? If so, what’s your trigger?  Yes.  Reality, usually.  Onions.  Reunions.  Goodbyes.  Two year olds.  

8. Do you have a chivalrous streak? How does it manifest itself?  Always.  If I see someone in need, I feel compelled to assist.  I do find, however, that it's a trait not often seen ANYWHERE or even taught for that matter.  My boys do, however, know "ladies first" and to hold the door and to offer with packages and to give their seat.  

9. Do you have a chauvinistic streak? How does it manifest itself?  No.  Thus, it doesn't.  And anyone with one, should remove themselves from the gene pool.

10. What’s your favorite movie?  I don't have a favorite movie!  GASP!!  Isn't that insane?!

11. What’s the dumbest, testosterone-inspired thing you’ve ever seen?  There simply isn't enough space on this blog to list it all -- truly.  Men (specifically in the south) are repeatedly encouraged to go to the lowest common denominator.  That's just ... sad.  UFC is one of those things, however, that makes me just shake my head in amazement that it's as popular as it is.

12. What quality do you think makes a good man good? Do you have that quality?  Someone who does what he says, and says what he means.  Someone that doesn't play games.  Someone that has integrity and can be counted on.... generally with a good sense of humor... a good foundation of experience on which to stand... educated... strong... compassion... 

Do "I" have those qualities   Yes....but that doesn't mean that I'm a man now, does it?  

13. Toilet seat up or down?  For me, down - ALWAYS, duh!  However, if you PUT it up.... then CLOSE the entire thing upon completion of your business.  It has a lid -- the lid is there TO BE CLOSED.  Period.

14. If your significant other is away, do you cook for yourself or eat out of cans and boxes (or rely on local drive-throughs and delivery)?  BWAHAHAHAHAHA -- I'm SO sorry, this is a constant "thing" in my house.  I always say that God-forbid ANYTHING were to happen to me because my children wouldn't see a home-cooked meal again unless there was a live-in nanny.  Sad, but true.  For me, I cook -- absofrigginloutely!  I'm a GREAT cook.  I rock.  Nuff said!

15. What societal expectation of being a man / women do you most resent?  
I don't know if I really resent any of the societal expectations for the gender roles.  I believe that many are inherent traits that are generally there because... we are in fact, wired quite differently.  Men are "supposed" to be the breadwinners and women are "supposed" to be the moms and stay at home and BE moms.  I think that typical gender role was established because women ARE more like "mama hens" than men are.  I believe most DO have an internal/maternal instinct.  However, perhaps those roles were forced upon society because of the great disparage in income potential between the sexes... it was more lucrative to be a man in the workplace than a woman.  I only resent the fact that people still view women as a weaker sex... and we are -- but only in terms of physical strength and that is it!  We're so freakin' crafty -- we MAKE people!  We are SUPERMOMS!

16. What’s the best part - societal-wise - about being a man / women?  Women -- probably getting free drinks at the bars!  Men -- because you can sleep around and not be considered a slut.  (Personally, I still find that men have it easier and thus better even though better isn't ALWAYS "easier" but in this scenario -- I say it is!)

17. Will you stop to ask for directions?  No, I have a nav system on my car and also on my phone.  If I am without either, I'm probably tied up in someone's trunk which means that I'd be incapable of asking for directions.  

18. What’s one thing about your significant other that you just cannot understand, no matter how hard you try?  How a sport can be more important than time with your family... or wife... 

19. What do you need to have in the shower?  In my shower I need water (obviously), shampoo and conditioner, a razor, and a bar of soap.  I am kind of funny about the soap thing, however, in that I require my OWN bar of soap.  I don't want a bar of soap that has touched anyone else's butt crack.  My bar of soap only touches washcloths.  

20. Do you burp/fart/scratch? Do you do anything stereotypically male?  Everyone burps, farts and scratches -- it is merely the location and company in which we choose to partake in these activities which leads us to be either civiliezd or uncivilized.  I am a lady.  I do not partake in the fart game.  However, burps... I don't really have an issue with them -- so long as they're not done at the dinner table.  As far as scratching, I don't really care where you scratch... but if you do it bare handed and it's in a "nether region" please wash your hands!  I mean, if you've got an itch -- you HAVE to scratch. 

And, for the record, I'm positive I've never done this ... in public.   


Anonymous said...

great and powerful answers!

Anonymous said...

Hi April. Glad you stop by. I agree about animals, we should allow them to live and killing them does not make a man.


Mr Lance said...

Brain - True! You do have a very good brain, I have read your blog, I can tell!! Loved the pictures! and your answer to #1 was perfect!

Have a great week!

Smellyann said...

"I don't want a bar of soap that has touched anyone else's butt crack."

LMFAO!!! I KNOW, right?!!! hahaha

Scudds Harrison said...

Hi April! I know, I am late again...that's the main thing that isn't sexy for me. lol

I love all your answers, definitely sexy! Yep! Brain that is!

Have a lovely week x

All the best,