Silence of Sunday

Since Ben and I co-sleep, typically when he goes back down at 5-5:30 a.m. from his morning feeding, I'm right there with him but I rarely am tired enough TO go back to sleep. This morning, I got him tucked in and decided to do some much needed... iGoogle reading! :) It's my therapy!

I love having quiet time. I can ponder lots of things... it really does get me thinking, though, about lots of things and faith and God and children and cooking and family and friends and games and crafts and... my mind simply will not stop when I get in the quiet.

I have one week from today when it's officially "SCHOOL SEASON" for the boys. This is Josh and Drew's last week of freedom. This is the week when they'll be going to bed at 8 and 9, respectively and ... starting on Wednesday, getting up by 7am just to get in the swing of things.

This past week we went and bought their uniforms for them at Fort Worth Christian. What I don't understand at all is why they cost so darn much. Seriously, Wal-Mart carries school uniforms where you can get 4 shirts for $18. I paid more than that for ONE shirt! Why? I'm seriously taking the clothes we bought to stores that sell uniforms and if I see something comparable, I'm buying it. Why the strictness for where the uniforms come from is ludicrous. If they're getting kickbacks from the uniform company... that's wrong. People are paying tuition to go there... don't nickel and dime them on uniforms...let them save money SOMEWHERE. :(

Another thing that happens when they start school is that I start on the weight loss journey again. It's been a while coming but since I"m back at my heavy weight again -- this is the weight I was before I joined Jenny Craig and lost 32 pounds the last time... I have to lose that same 32 pounds again. A lot of it will be easy once I'm not eating out for lunch with the kids and once I start walking/jogging again. I'd prefer to jog but that's not going to happen right now. My boobs are HUGE! Nursing boobs are just... seriously, I'm a 34DD in real life. While nursing, I'm probably a double F. As in are you EFFing kidding me? I rejoined Weight Watchers and they have great resources and diet plans for nursing moms. Seriously, they're huge and I hate them. My friend Aymie (that I went to high school with) is on Facebook and she had a reduction done and said it's the best thing she ever did. I'm seriously considering it after I'm done playing Nurse Bessie Moo Cow. One of my problems right now is that I can't find a COMFORTABLE BRA! I have two racing back bras that put SO MUCH strain/hurt on my shoulder muscles that I dread wearing them. I want a NORMAL bra that just happens to be a nursing bra. I don't have one and it sucks. So, obviously, since I have no 'normal bra' I can't realistically jog because, well, I gotta keep the girls in place. So, I will walk...and walk.. and walk.

I don't have a jogging stroller so I'm going to use the regular stroller and hope it will hold up. I hate, however, that it only has one brake. One of them apparently broke off. Waah.

What else has happened...Ben was given the go ahead at his 4 month check up to start solids. Our regular pediatrician, Dr. Knapp, was at Philmont so he wasn't there and the lady that saw us in his absence just wasn't as ... I don't know... just wasn't Dr. Knapp. You know how people are with their physicians? If it's not them, it's just not them! He only gained a little weight but he grew a couple of inches. Hard to grow all the way around...out and up I supposed. I've never started the boys on rice cereal until they were 5 1/2 to 6 months. I think the issue I'm facing right now is ... I'm an exclusively breastfeeding mom. For me to give him cereal means that I need to MIX it with some liquid something... but I don't pump so ?? Do I use water? Formula? I don't know what to use. I'm not "anti" formula but I do hate that it stains but I don't see -- even if I wanted TO pump -- how I'd be able to pump enough milk to use for these purposes of having enough to mix with the rice, oatmeal or whatever a couple of times a day.

I'm having continual Mommy Guilt from not getting out the camera more often. I hate that I don't...and I know these moments won't last forever but since my small one bit the dust... it's just a pain to break out the big dog all the time. Starting the first week of school, I'm going to be doing weekly pictures of all 3 boys. That's on my "to do" list. I actually have it as a recurring appointment on my calendar.

I'm also starting with FlyLady. I hope to get a system down in my house so that I don't need a housekeeper anymore and can just manage it all myself in just minutes a day.

OH... and my friend Eric sold me 4 pieces of furniture for $130. My mom sold one for $70 and then refinished the other 3 for me. I let her keep the $70. AND THEN... I found this great idea for a "home command center" that I just really want to do and my mom went and got the two pieces of sheet metal to make it happen! I'm so excited! Basically what we're going to do is install these two 2x4 pieces of sheet metal on the empty wall in the laundry room (in studs -- it's heavy!). We will then frame the perimeter with some chair rail. Then we will get these little decorative corner pieces. I will then fill the space with filler and then paint the edges. I can't decide if I should go black or white. I'm thinking black since I'm going to install a black counter top in there but??? Don't know yet. Once it's all the way we want it, it will have a file folder hanger on it... a calendar... our weekly menu... magnets to hold up important papers... the chore chart and anything else that is magnetic and that I want up on the wall! I'm QUITE thrilled to have my home command center coming together!

I'm excited to have signed back up for MOPS and for the Mom's League again. I hope that will help me get out of the house some more and develop some great friendships again.

I'm hoping that by getting all these things in my life together it will enable things to run smoothly and for me to get off the computer... forget about the unnecessary and spend lots of quality time being a mother and wife... those are the two most important things in my life to me.