Saturday, September 18, 2010

Pile it on...

What a complete and crazy comedy of errors the day has brought thus far. For the last three nights I've had unprecedented bouts of insomnia which leave me utterly exhausted by day's end. Last night, unfortunately was no different. I was operating on about 3 maybe 3 1/2 hours' sleep at 7am when I finally woke up Ben to nurse since I had overflowed onto my t-shirt. Ugh. Starting out my morning soggy. Just a bit of foreshadowing on how my day was to come.

Andy got ready and on the road to pick up William and head to L-town (Lubbock) to watch the Red Raiders take on the Longhorns (GO RAIDERS!)

For some odd reason, Ben was still sleepy pretty much right after he nursed so I obliged him and let him go back to sleep (with me right along side him.) Andy had said good morning/good bye to Drew before he left and that kept him up. I knew he could pretty much fend for himself for breakfast so I was feeling no guilt going back to sleep.

I'd JUST... and seriously, I mean just fallen back to sleep when Drew comes in to ask a question. I'm sure it was something that was SO important that it just COULD.NOT.WAIT. I whispered something completely indiscernible waved my hand and out he walked. Again, I was looking so, so, soooooo very much to getting back to sleep when in AGAIN came Drew. This time with a LOUD annoying whisper. You know the kind that is SUPPOSED to be a whisper but it more like muffled throat straining, "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM, CAN I GO TO MIMI'S?" I just tell him that I"ll take him there at 11. "BUT SHE'LL COME GET ME NOW." Man alive I was not going to get any sleep. I knew I needed sleep before I just snapped and bit his head off. He was bored and wanted a playmate. "You can go. At 11, when I take you!" He walked out really sad. But, at that moment, the important thing was that HE WALKED OUT!

I woke back up about 10:20 a.m. and fed Ben. Then I made my way to the kitchen with sore feet, stiff back, headache, growling stomach and called my mother-in-law to apologize. She said that he'd called her wanting to come over and they'd offered to come get him and take him to the game. Wasn't that the sweetest thing? I, of course, said YES immediately and began to gather his things together.
  • Baseball shirt - check.
  • Cleats - Hmmm, where were those cleats? Oh yes, he'd taken them off in my closet when he took a shower in my room after practice on Thursday. Cleats - check
  • Hat - check
  • Equipment bag - I headed out to my car to fish it out of the trunk. Bag - check
  • Water bottle - check
  • Red socks - check
  • Red belt - check
  • Pants - YIKES! I have no idea what color pants. I give them a pair of white AND a pair of grey pants and the send an e-mail to the coach and to Andy and start fishing through e-mail to see what color. Finally Andy calls and says that he'll call to make sure they know "white" pants. So, pants, check!

They're here and get his "stuff" and head out the door.

"OH WAIT! Josh, run this form out to the car, QUICK!" It's a form to order team and individual pictures which was today. Whew! We barely made it before they pulled away

I wake Ben about 20 minutes before we needed to be there. He's, of course, hungry. I scoop him up and tell him, "Eat quick, Kid, we gotta jet!" Surprisingly, he does!

Dad calls on the home phone asking where everyone was. I tell him I'm getting us packed up to head out the door and he said he doesn't see anyone yet or the picture people. I said, "Well, Ed and Sharon are there with Drew. They're at field 4. That's all I know." He says he'll see me when we get there.

We're in the garage packing up when my cell phone rings. I'm annoyed, don't they know I'm busy? But since Andy's gone and Sharon's got Drew, I figure I better answer because you just never know. By this time, it's ten minutes before game time. I'm doing my best to get out of the door.

"How far away are you?"

It's my mother in law.


"Drew forgot his glove?"

My blood pressure starts to rise. Clearly, I'm annoyed. I noticed a stupid glove in the back of my car but I remembered asking whose glove it was not two days before and Josh had said HIS glove was the loose one in the back of the car. I didn't pay attention to WHICH glove... just that it was a loose glove in the back and it obviously had to be Josh's. I was so wrong. UGH! They'd gotten their gloves out to play catch last night and instead of putting it back WHERE HE GOT IT FROM he just threw it in the back of my car. Well, I just grabbed the equipment bag because I KNEW everything was in it LAST NIGHT when I put it in my car!

I now knew, I had to hurry even moreso than I was already intending to hurry. Seriously, why can't I just be ON TIME? WHY? Is it inevitable when you have children that you'll be annoyingly late to everything?

I backed out of the garage in a hurry. Obviously, irritated because I'm THIRSTY and now won't have time to stop and get a drink. I get about four houses down then realize, DUH, you forgot the stinkin stroller for Ben. Reverse down the street, open the garage, load up the stroller and get back on the road.

I get another call from my Dad. "Are you sure they're on Field 4?" Then it dawns on me.... he's at the wrong field. "Dad, remember, Drew doesn't play for KYA any longer? He's at Richland Hills." I give dad directions how to get there and apologize profusely for not confirming an address for him.

So, I'm speeding down the way trying to get there as quickly as I can. Josh says I ran over a squirrel. I don't think I did but I'm certainly not going that way for a while because I don't want to think I did. I avoid carnage at all costs, you know.

We get to the park and immediately call dad with an address. I pull to the entrance, give Josh Drew's glove and tell him to RUN. I said, "I have no idea where the field is, only that they're on Field 4 and it's at the back. RUN." We are 5 minutes late. I drive around in the parking lot trying to find a space. Pull in and get the stroller out the back. Load up the diaper bag. Load up the fan (yes, it was hot and I brought a battery-operated smaller camping fan to keep Ben cool). Go to unhook him from his car seat and feel wet on my arm when I pull him out. I think to myself, "Oh, he didn't burp much after he ate. He spit up on me."

Um. Wrong.

Dead wrong.

Yellow, runny poop-blow out the diaper-all over the arm, my shirt, the car seat wrong. All kinds of wrong was I. Shit was everywhere. At that point I just looked at him and ...

LAUGHED! What the hell else are you supposed to do on a day like that?! I said you know what... DISH IT OUT! We can take it... you're a mess, man. Lets get you cleaned up. I sat him in the floorboard and used about 200 wipes to clean up everything as best I could. I stripped him down and get him changed.

At this point, he's loaded up in the stroller, it's hot. I'm already a sweaty mess. I walk up to a canopy where there are picture people and she tells me that I'm at the wrong one, the baseball picture people are at the end of the park. Ok, I figure, I'll hit them on the way to the field that I'm walking to that I have no clue where it is.

It's an odd shaped park actually. It's 4 baseball fields with a football field dead center. Just, weird to me. I walk to the back and spot the team. Drew was up to bat right when I got there. Good base hit and safe at first. WOO HOO!

I see my mother-in-law and wave to her. She takes Ben. She tells me that the picture lady named Sharon told her to just have me pay for everything all at once. But, now the picture people are no where to be found. UGH! So, no team or individual picture of Drew. I took the form back and am hoping that I can get it taken care of via email. We'll see.

Since Sharon has Ben and he's content for the moment, I snap a few pictures of the boys in action. While doing so, I stand right in an ant pile. Yeah, April. It's just par for the course of my day.

Good thing: the Red Sox won.

Drew goes home with Mimi and Pop and I am thankful for that. I don't think I'm cut to entertain anyone right now. Even six-year-olds that entertain themselves.

I went by Sonic and ordered up three chili cheese dogs with tater tots and got me a Route 44 unsweetened peach tea. Thank you, Jesus, for these amazing thirst quenchers! For that 10 minute ride home, Ben fell asleep in the car and now, at 5:45 p.m. He's not falling back asleep. What does this mean? He'll be screaming all night at Josh's football game. Oh joy what fun that will be.


Frugal Vicki said...

ROFL! I will admit, that is the one thing we were grateful for...that it didn't happen five minutes later in the car!
You poor woman!

brandt! said...

REALLY >>>> are you a RED SOX FAN?!?! ... i know now why I like you!!!!
What a day woman .. sounds like you could use Maine's cool air .. no ant hill .. no fans to carry ..!!