Saturday, November 10, 2012

30 Days of Thanksgiving -- Day 10

If you're keeping up, and you clearly should be -- if for no other reason than to know the current date -- that it's time for another installment of 30 Days of Thanksgiving. 

As usual, our recap is as follows: 

Day 1: glow sticks
Day 2: Pampers
Day 3: cold weather
Day 4: Canton, TX
Day 5: Q-tips
Day 6: Inside jokes
Day 7: The inexistence of mind readers
Day 8: Wal-Martians
Day 9: Thongs 

And, obviously, this leads us to today -- Day 10. 

Drumroll please.... today I am thankful for anti-depressants. 

I'm quite sure that this is a pretty obscure item to be thankful for.  I am, however, quite thankful for them.  I'm not actually on them, but according to several studies, it shows that in the last 20 years, prescriptions for these meds has increased over 400%.  One in eleven persons over the age of 12 is on them and that's an estimated 27 million Americans!  That's a lot of pill poppers!  

Could you imagine the level of anxiety, strife and agitation in this country should people actually have to deal with reality on a regular basis...UNmedicated?  GASP!

I'm thankful for Zoloft, Lexapro, Prozac, Paxil, Cymbalta, Luvox, Remeron, Effexor, Celexa, Wellbutrin, Savella and Vestra!

What I don't understand is how anyone who takes these would want to deal with the laundry list of side effects: nausea, insomnia, ejaculation issues (not that I would need worry about that), diarrhea, dizziness, dry mouth, fatigue, drowsiness, indigestion, shakiness, loss of appetite, decreased libido, hot flashes, nervousness, sweating.... to name a few.

Maybe with a high enough dosage, users won't feel so bad about shitting themselves while shaking to death in a pool of their own sweat feeling nauseous because their stomach is empty due to the fact that they have no appetite.  They're also ridiculously moody from being exhausted but since they're unable to count the sheep, they stay in this agitated state.  This also means that they'll likely be unmotivated to do much of anything -- especially sex which is due to the fact that they can neither get off nor have the libido to have the desire to do so... which will just  LEAVE THEM DEPRESSED!  Yeah, that's a great circular path of logic.  

I say you're probably better off hitting the damn gym, getting some natural mood altering sweat going for yourself and then trying that out for a spell.  :)  

But, if it keeps your psychosis and crazies at bay... pop those pills!

1 comment:

Alexis AKA MOM said...

Some days I think I may need something but then I won't be able to duct tape the kids to a wall! :)